August 7 - Assumption of righteous Anna, mother of the Virgin and wife of St. Joachim, who miraculously gave birth to a daughter after many years of a childless marriage. Therefore, it is not surprising that today believers in prayers to righteous Anna ask for help in giving children.

But if some parents beg the Lord for children, then others, who have organized themselves into a whole community, deliberately refuse to have children, so categorically that they even go for sterilization.

I rarely watch TV. We simply don't have it. But when I look, I always get upset. So this time, when I was visiting my mother, I got on the news, where the TSN journalist in his usual brisk manner talked about the latest fashion from enlightened Europe - “childfree”. For those who mastered the English course at school, it will not be difficult to translate this phrase - "free from children."

It followed from the report that now we also have a category of people who deliberately refuse to have children, and sometimes so categorically that they even go for sterilization. The motivation is banal - I do not want anything and no one to fetter my freedom(“after all, then we won’t be able to break loose at any moment and fly to spend the weekend in another country”), spoil the figure, break a career and so on. Everything would be fine, but these "childfree" behave aggressively, filling social networks with slogans like "Down with all pregnant women", "Dchildren are the flowers of life, so they are either in the water or in the ground! by joining online communities and promoting child-free lifestyles.

Then my husband and I, sighing about the corrupted West and exchanging a couple of phrases like “But if your parents were childfree, you wouldn’t fly, you bastard, for any weekends,” safely forgot about it. But recently this topic has surfaced again - I came across an article on the Internet about childless "stars" of the pop industry - happy, successful, self-sufficient (according to the author), able to ignore social stereotypes.

Of course, there were also discussions here, supporters of the traditional family also declared themselves, but somehow they were lost against the background of cynics sparkling with wit.

The results of my further monitoring of the network also turned out to be disappointing - blogs, forums, websites of certified psychologists, articles in information publications - all unanimously declared: “How long will we torment a woman with an unnecessary reproduction of a biomaterial that no one needs? Stop putting pressure on the family (or, sorry, partners) with constant reproaches about heirs, you need to live for yourself, realize yourself as a person, but then, maybe, if both partners are aware of such a need, they will weigh their capabilities, etc., etc. P.". The traditional view of a family with children, as natural and logical, is unambiguously supported only by Christian publications and websites for young parents.

But in fairness, nevertheless, it is worth noting that the opinion of the Internet on this issue is far from the opinion of the people. There is a moment of propaganda here. Yes, maybe it’s hard for me to talk about public opinion, spending half the day on the playground, where moms and dads with small children didn’t have a question of giving birth or not giving birth at all, and questions of figure, career, success are seen by them in a completely different light. And yet, I feel, and I clearly see that childlessness due to infertility, physical inability to conceive and bear a child is perceived by us as a great grief, and the absence of children in young healthy couples causes at least bewilderment and notorious jokes, reproaches from friends and relatives .

Everything is still in its place - both conservative public opinion and the desire of most families to have children.

But then where did "childfree" come from?

From the same place where the worship of homosexuality came to us, where recipes for a successful and beautiful life are cooked up (and clear examples of it, of course), where they are taught to nurture and nurture your ego.

Tolerant Europe and the American continent allegedly provided their citizens with decent salaries and the best medicine, but it is a stubborn fact that the number of Europeans and Americans who want to procreate is not increasing, but vice versa. And disadvantaged African and Asian countries, contrary to all logic, are breaking birthrate records. Although no, experts say that even there, birth rates are declining.

What do these unfortunate people who breed in unsanitary conditions hope for? For the same thing that everyone hoped for and always - in God. They live without bothering with reasoning and calculations, suffering from epidemics and hunger, but still they live.

A civilized person is hyper-responsible - he cannot "have a child" until he provides the future child with a sufficient level of comfort, and the higher the responsibility, the more claims to comfort. And very often such perfectionism reaches its highest point - the rejection of children in general. Well, a person, even a very wealthy one, will not be able to change the increasingly deteriorating ecology for his child, stop terrorism, etc.

And a believer in the matter of having a child is more similar to a native

All the responsibility that a developed European puts on his shoulders, the believer trusts God, trusting, first of all, in Him. And he wins by receiving according to his faith. And public opinion at such a moment is absolutely on the side of those who dare to give birth to a child in spite of anything, and our folklore only confirms this: “God gave a bunny, he will give a lawn”, “a child is born with a loaf of bread in his bosom”, etc.

But this is where public opinion is tempted, and what is clearly seen from the thematic forums is the possibility of living for your own pleasure. This is the main trump card of "childfree". It is not perfectionist beliefs that drive them, but the most banal egoism.

And sometimes these beliefs are so cynical and disgusting in nature that you just get scared. And in this they are helped by our modern culture, mass media aimed at consumption.

“When a child appears, you will get fat, your family will fall apartyou will never again have money, freedom…”; “If you decide to have a child, then it will become your absolute and highest priority. If you remind him of this when he or she gets older, and something goes wrong, he/she will throw through their teeth "I didn't ask to be born""; “Babies are terrible. Their scream is the most annoying sound on earth and there is no way to stop it... They don't eat baby puree, but spit it out within reach. They spray urine on you when you bathe them. No person with a healthy head would accept a pet into the house that would have habits close to the average child”; “Sooner or later at some point in life, your child will probably be very angry with you, and may even hate you, sometimes for years, sometimes forever. One single mistake of yours will be enough to cancel out the YEARS of your life given to your child”; "Even scarier - the disability of the child, you will either compromise with your conscience and a likely break with your partner, and refuse the miracle of nature generated by you, or find a new meaning in your existence, which will no longer be life, in the full sense of the word Love to play the lottery ?(quotes are taken from the childfree forum, where the authors give 20 reasons not to have children).

In this light, indeed, the birth of children seems to be a sheer absurdity - a series of unnecessary sacrifices - and in the name of what? The notorious glass of water, which is not too much to expect from modern children? Improving the demographic situation? Rave!

And here, not every opponent of conscious childlessness has the enthusiasm to describe all the charms of motherhood and fatherhood, so that these misguided people understand how deeply they are mistaken. After all, how to tell those who break their foreheads in the name of their principles, how to joyfully step over their rightness for the sake of reconciliation with loved ones? To tell those who have never sacrificed their sleep for a good cause, how comforting it is, after sitting (or running) at the bedside of a sick person all night, in the morning to finally hear a measured snore and feel the cherished 36.6 with your lips? Or to someone who has never endured pain for the sake of another, to explain that feeling of a miracle, when a new life is born in agony?

A person who is not ready to make a small sacrifice is simply not worthy of children. And although they (like other relatives and friends), alas, often bring grief, these sorrows must also be earned.

It's no secret that today even people who know nothing about this destructive subculture consider it reasonable and "modern" to postpone the birth of children at least far away... THIS IS THE RESULT OF PROPAGANDA!

In the Western "democratic" society, the child-free movement is gaining serious strength, in Russian - "free from children." Why is this concept so attractive to young people, why is it so popular and why is it being planted on the Slavic people, let's figure it out.

FORMATION OF THE CHILDFREE MOVEMENT

Let's start with Wikipedia:
"Childfree (eng. childfree - free from children; eng. childless by choice, voluntary childless - voluntarily childless) - a subculture and ideology characterized by a conscious reluctance to have children. The main idea of ​​​​childfree is the rejection of children in the name of personal freedom and the promotion of a childless lifestyle ".

What high-profile terms, subculture, ideology... A movement arose in the 1970s in California, of course, in America. Here it makes sense to dwell in more detail.

2 feminists Ellen Peck and Shirley Rudl organized the "National Organization for Non-Parents". The reason why they did this was to infringe on the rights of childless families. And the main argument was:

In the early 70s, a thirty-year-old woman without children was perceived as inferior. The justification for her childlessness was considered by people to be poor health, non-traditional sexual orientation, mental illness, alcohol or drug abuse. It never occurred to anyone that a woman does not have children for one simple reason - she has no desires
Women, although not, women even came up with a holiday with the date - August 1 - "Non-Parents' Day", but it was not possible to achieve wide publicity. Apparently they realized that American society is not yet ready to give up children. It takes time to brainwash.

It took a whole 20 years to raise a generation that will take the bait. The approach has also changed, if in the 70s the problem was said openly, then in 1992 the spread began through the worldwide Internet. And the school teacher Leslie Lafayette was chosen as the organizer of the community. But again, it went with a creak, but was it necessary for the instigators of the fraud?

A precedent was set, and the Childfree movement began to spread on its own, like a virus, many countries of the world were infected, including those in the post-Soviet space. And the popularity of this movement is growing. But we will talk about the methods of promoting this “ideology” a little lower.

ARGUMENTS THAT SHOULD MAKE US CHILDLESS

There are not so many of them, and they are extremely controversial, however, this is enough for a person to decide for himself, “but it’s true, it’s better without children!”

Childfree were many great personalities of the past, for example, Nietzsche, Da Vinci, Plato, Copernicus, Newton. They already knew a lot about children!
- The child imposes a lot of restrictions and causes problems.
- The child requires a lot of attention and time.
- Pregnancy is a complete torment, all these toxicosis, excess weight, frequent mood swings. It can destroy your "happy family".

To a normal person, all these arguments will seem like complete idiocy, but we live in an abnormal society.

The only thing we can do is not fight them, no, in no case, we need to show by example that a child is happiness, that with due attention and care, a child turns from a problem into a person who can be proud of.

Do you know why in the USSR they didn’t broadcast on the news about terrorist acts, but they were? Because if you do not talk about a terrorist act, then there will be no point in committing them. The purpose of terrorism is to intimidate.

Today it is customary to talk mostly about terrible things, dysfunctional families, problems, murders, robberies, and so on. negativity pours on us from all sides, and does it make our life better? Maybe the powers that be want a good life for us? The question is rhetorical.

WHAT IS CHIDFREE'S TRUE PURPOSE?

I think you can guess yourself. Goal number 1 is to reduce the birth rate among the thinking population, the so-called middle class. Well, the working class is no longer needed in such numbers.

Middle class

The popularity of the movement among successful people who have covered basic needs is very high and I can explain this. If a successful person decides to have a child, then there is a serious chance that this child can continue the family business, he will have a child and also continue the family business, and if there are many smart and successful people, then the chair under the “powers of this world will shake”, therefore they are trying by all means to prevent the emergence of competitors.

Working class

It is even simpler here, hands are no longer needed, people are being replaced by robots, there are more and more unemployed, homeless, beggars who do not consume, this is bio-waste that should not produce offspring.
Conditions are created so that thoughts about childfree arise on their own.

The benefits are obvious - a decrease in resistance, the more stupid a society is, the easier it is to control it, if influential and successful people have children who continue their activities, then sooner or later the modern top will have a hard time.

WAYS TO PROMOTE CHILD FREE TO THE MASS

The promotion is in full swing, the necessary ideas are already being broadcast by individual popular personalities, the media, and, of course, Hollywood.

Popular personalities

This is the perfect channel of influence that works. Opinion leaders, idols and authorities with a bang spread the right ideas to the masses.

George Clooney (actor)

Even one child running around in the garden of my villa can make me nervous

Cameron Diaz (actress)

To be honest, we don't need more kids. There are already too many people on Earth. Though I never say never

Kim Cattrall (actress)

I am a woman who has no children and who will never sit still. I like children, but for a short time. At first I think they are nice, cute and funny, and then my head starts to hurt

Renee Zellweger (actress)

Motherhood was not my goal. I never took him seriously.

Robbie Williams (singer)

What's the point? After all, I cannot guarantee that my child will not be hurt one day, because at a certain stage life makes you feel miserable. I don't want to see it.

In the Russian segment, the promotion of child-FREE was entrusted to video bloggers.

Dmitry Larin (video blogger)

Yuri Khovansky (video blogger)

I will not embed the video for ethical reasons. But Yuriy did not limit himself to one video, from time to time in his videos he uses phrases like “I hate children” and its derivatives.

If we take into account that the audience of both Larin and Khovansky are schoolchildren and teenagers, we can conclude that in 5-10 years we should expect a decrease in the birth rate.

In promoting the CHILDFREE idea, the following people were noticed:

Women's magazines like Cosmopolitan, Hello!, Natalie.
- television channels - Channel One.
- sites - Woman ru (the largest women's portal), Vkontakte (many communities).
- Hollywood

In many films made in the West, the relationship between children and parents is strained. Parents do not understand children, but children do not understand parents, and this is the norm for Hollywood.

It is worth paying attention to the fact that in many films, especially about superheroes whose audience is young, the main characters do not have children.

These are not all propagandists, so I ask you to help in identifying such individuals. As they say, you need to know the enemy by sight.

THE MAIN ARGUMENT AGAINST CHILD FREE

The continuity of generations, although it is already almost lost, childfrees drive a nail into the coffin so that they don’t even think about how wonderful it is to pass on family traditions, values, accumulated knowledge, skills, skills further to their descendants, how amazing is global planning when your goals are realized by your children and grandchildren.

But childfree is just one of the options. There are many more "controversial" opinions that dominate people's minds, for example:

Freedom to choose the type of activity (if each generation starts from scratch, it will be extremely difficult to achieve success, but in general it will be impossible);
- drugs, alcohol, tobacco (everything is a poison that kills us, the paradox is that for our own money);
- deterioration in the level of education (the main goal is to discourage the desire to learn);
- deteriorating living standards and inflation, wars, terrorism;
- an increase in the length of the working day (many work 12 hours a day to earn money, does anyone really think that you can raise a normal child with such a schedule?);
- consumer way of thinking (do not create, only use someone else's - Western);
favorite tactic - divide and conquer (in every country people are divided, they are divided according to - territorial, religious, ideological, ideological, political affiliation, and then small groups are crushed on the field - football or martial arts fans, musical styles, videos, and so on. - The more the society is fragmented, the easier it is to suppress the uprisings of the discontented, since the society simply cannot gather in large groups), etc.

This is a systematic approach to the destruction of the human creator and the reduction of the population of the population. A slippery slope that we are led down by those who have the power, information and resources.

Modern society is full of new ideas that do not always correspond to the dogmas of the Orthodox Church and God's commandments. One of these teachings includes the modern childfree movement (translated from English free from children). It lies in the fact that people openly admit that they do not want and will not have children.

And at first glance, there is nothing wrong here, because the desire to create a family is individual and is not a forced imposition of society or, moreover, the Church. How to relate to supporters of such ideas and what the clergy think about this - the answers to these questions can be found in this article.

The main theses of ideology

The childfree movement arose in the 40s of the last century in California, USA, where for the first time women openly declared that they did not want to be mothers and did not believe that motherhood was a woman's destiny. Since then, this position has attracted an increasing number of women and has spread throughout the world, reaching Europe and Russia.

The birth of a child is not the goal of marriage for all young families

Today in the territory of the Russian Federation there are more than 5,000 people who openly declare their belonging to this movement. Naturally, most of them are women, since men are still less concerned about the problems of childbearing.

In order to form a clear position in relation to the movement, one should know its main thesis: children are the conscious choice of every woman. The decision to give birth or not is taken only by a woman, since this is her body and her life. If she wants to build a career, and considers sex only as a pleasant entertainment and a way to relax, then why should she give birth? Women's destiny does not lie in this, not only motherhood is a vocation, but also work, travel, self-development and other exciting things.

Attention! Thus, the supporters of the movement are in favor of free will and their rights - they do not want to have children and do not have them. Sociologists say that this movement arose as a result of excessive pressure on women.

Indeed, in the 40s of the last century, men did not consider them as competitors to themselves in offices and factories, women were always at home and raised children. Therefore, childfree and opposed such a categorical view of a woman and the pressure of society. After all, those who did not have children at that time (and this is still common today) were subjected to ridicule and condemnation.

Orthodoxy and childfree

Children, from the point of view of Orthodoxy, are a gift from above. David wrote that the Lord filled his quiver with arrows - sons and accepted it as a gift. The Jews considered this a blessing from God, and the Lord Himself commanded Adam and Eve to be fruitful and multiply.

Children are a gift from God

So to give birth means to receive a gift to the family. Despite this, we see in Scripture that many women at that time remained barren (Elizabeth, Anna, Mary's parents) and took it as a curse of God, so they prayed tirelessly. That is having children was previously considered a great privilege, and those who could not have them took it as a great grief.

About childbearing:

Today, the view of Orthodoxy on this has not changed, but medicine has begun to offer many means that violate the Lord's laid down - contraceptives allow you to bypass His commands, and IVF and other methods - forcibly and against God's will to receive children. A child today is just a toy in the hands of parents. Therefore, the clergy first of all want to instruct husbands and wives so that they approach this issue correctly, without violating God's will.

Important! From the point of view of the Orthodox Church, to become parents is to receive a blessing.

If a person, by his own conviction, refuses this, it is his choice. The Lord does not force anyone and gives a choice to a person, this is the essence of everything. However, in the document "Fundamentals of the Social Concept of the Russian Orthodox Church" in the section on bioethics, it is said that the refusal to bear children for selfish motives is a sin. Perhaps this position has developed as a result of psychological trauma, and then it is best to contact a psychologist.

The opinion of the clergy

Priest Oleg Bulychev says that when women begin to "put pressure" on others, declaring that only their position is correct, turning to insults and bringing all sorts of confusion - this is considered a sin. When they kill babies in the womb by having abortions or using chemical methods of contraception.

Large family of an Orthodox priest

If a woman does not want to become a mother, then she should not live sexually - this will be a fair act. It is written in Scripture that a woman will be saved through childbearing, i.e. giving birth and introducing a child to the Church. If this does not happen, does she receive a blessing? Hardly.

Mother Elena Fetisova is of the opinion that having many children is a manifestation of faith. Complaining about the difficulty of maternal fate today is silly, when there are so many gadgets that make life easier. The refusal to give birth to a child is only a whim of a spoiled life and a consequence of the destroyed institution of the family in society. After all, if a woman is not sure that her lover will ever marry her, will she give birth to him?

Important! To accept a blessing from the Lord or not is the decision of each person. Parenthood is a wonderful time when God puts His gifts into the hands of people. Is it worth giving up on them?

Archpriest Andrei Tkachev on the childfree movement

Childfree - people who voluntarily refuse to have children and loudly announce this to the whole world. A huge number of celebrities of different eras refused children. These are ballerinas, and actresses, and writers, and scientists. The fashion of "not having children" is so widespread in Europe and is advancing so rapidly in the expanses of the former USSR that it's time to talk about this new phenomenon that ignores the demographic policy of states. For what?

What is the meaning of the idea?

Full-fledged from a physical and psychological point of view, adults, often married or in permanent relationships, profess a conscious rejection of fatherhood / motherhood, and on this basis they gather in groups that cheer each other up.

Sociological studies have shown that childfree couples are more educated, more in demand as professionals and leaders, have more income, tend to live in cities, are less religious, less inclined to adhere to traditional gender roles and customs.

Childfrees explain their choice with a large number of different reasons. For example, these people want nothing to hinder their freedom, because a child is forever, and where is the guarantee that you will like your child? Childfree live an active life and do not want to be responsible for anything, because without children they can easily and quickly change jobs, hobbies, place of residence, they have free time for friends, entertainment, hobbies.

Childfree believe that the appearance of a child will interfere with their career growth and the need to do what they personally like: with a one-year-old baby, you don’t really read a book, you get up at one in the afternoon or you don’t come home to spend the night, taking a walk at a party. Some couples do not want to destroy harmony in relations with each other, and the appearance of a child undoubtedly changes all value systems and lifestyles in the family.

It's hard to believe, but there are people who simply don't feel the need to have a child and have no biological desire to be a parent. And there are people who just do not like children. Some women experience fear and aversion to pregnancy, childbirth and the postpartum period.

The most altruistic childfree claim that they do not have children just because they do not want to bring them into this terrible and tragic world of bad ecology, all sorts of disasters and melted ice cream.

Raise the kids or leave them at home!

In the West, the childfree movement has become an entire industry: hotels, restaurants, movie theaters that don't let kids in. Some deliberately choose months for holidays that are not burdened by school holidays in order to protect themselves as much as possible from spitting in the face from a young impudent cheering on by a contented mom.

But the fact that many experience an acute reluctance to be near children is not the fault of the kids themselves, but rather their parents, who, for mysterious reasons, believe that “Everything is Possible for My Child, He is Small!”. And when you come to a good restaurant to sit and talk with a person who is tired after a hard day at work, and a couple of children are running around who consider it their duty to squeal so that their eardrums burst, you really want to come up and punch their self-satisfied parents in the nose: or educate children are fine, or leave them at home.

By the way, childfree is not necessarily child-haters. Rather, they profess the principle: “I like elephants, but I don’t need my own.”

The main enemies of childfree

People who do not want to have children are mostly peaceful and do not impose their opinions on anyone, prudently avoiding parental parties filled with discussions of diapers and baby food.

And normal parents absolutely do not care if someone else has children or not - they are too busy with the abyss of tenderness at the sight of bubbles that their newborn child blows.

But there are also inadequate lovers of pink babies who hate childfree so fiercely, as if they eat kids, and do not feel reluctance to have them. The brain of most people is so arranged that they are unable to pass by those who do not share their views on life. The level of philistine dislike for childfree is comparable to the level of rejection of homosexuals, bats, those who say the word "boring" through "sh" and other obscure, and, therefore, dangerous natural phenomena. The most common statements of moms and dads, aimed at rotting childless adults who do not suffer from this childlessness, but enjoy it:

  • who will serve a glass of water in old age?
  • children are the flowers of life!
  • give birth - naturally!
  • What if your parents didn't want kids?
  • it’s just that no one loves you, doesn’t want you, and all this is a twist from dissatisfaction!

In the heat of the moment, the possibility is safely excluded that the childfree has loved ones and friends, as well as the fact that a huge part of the children spits on their parents, not at all eager to take care of them.

Religious conservatives believe that voluntary childlessness is a rebellion against God. Church officials approach this topic as condemningly as they treat homosexuals and same-sex marriages. They call childfree "infected" and "barren pagans." However, the church condemns contraception just as uncompromisingly.

Childfree of all countries, unite!

Various problems, including rejection in society, force childfree to create support groups where people communicate with each other and become more confident, knowing that they are not alone. The most famous Russian childfree community is based in LiveJournal, the most popular foreign community is NoKidding! - spawned offshoots all over the world.

Childfree are people of various worldviews and religions, and their views do not always coincide. Many childfree people regret having to fund public schools and kindergartens through flat taxation. Some think of state child support as a discriminatory subsidy for childless lifestyles. There are those who agree with the need to help parents, but believe that the childfree lifestyle also needs support.

I read it and saw myself. I don't want to have children because:

  • childbearing, childbirth and the postpartum period are torments and wasted years of life;
  • diapers and screams at night do not bring me any joy, and no "kind smile of a sweet child" compensates for sleepless nights and depression from everyday life;
  • I don’t want to feel like a fat nut after giving birth;
  • no one wants to hire (especially for a managerial position) a girl with a small child, because this is a permanent sick leave;
  • having children, it is impossible to spend your free time the way you want: to go out late, attend concerts, play sports, receive additional education, etc.
  • disappointment if the child does not grow up as expected.
And it often becomes insulting when a married lady of my age looks at me from above and with regret and does not understand how I am not married and do not want children. Although my life is much happier than hers. Because she sits at home, does laundry, cleans and waits on her husband, and my life is filled with bright events and impressions. This does not mean that I treat people with children badly. It's just unpleasant when they look down on you if you are somehow different from others.