How to adopt a child from the Baby House: necessary documents. Adoption of children in Russia: how to take a child from an orphanage

According to statistics for 2016, more than 148 thousand children from orphanages were brought up in foster families. Five thousand of them returned to the orphanage. Women who abandoned foster children, what it is like to be the mother of a non-native child and what prompted them to make a difficult decision.

Irina, 42 years old

A daughter was brought up in Irina's family, but she and her husband wanted a second child. The husband, for medical reasons, could no longer have children, the couple decided to adopt. There was no fear, because Irina worked as a volunteer and had experience in dealing with refuseniks.

- I went against the wishes of my parents. In August 2007, we adopted a one-year-old Misha from the house. The first shock for me was the attempt to rock him. Nothing worked, he rocked himself: he crossed his legs, put two fingers in his mouth and rocked from side to side. Later I realized that the first year of Misha's life in the orphanage became lost: the child did not form an attachment. Children in the baby house are constantly changing nannies so that they do not get used to it. Misha knew that he was adopted. I conveyed this to him carefully, like a fairy tale: I said that some children are born in the stomach, while others are born in the heart, so you were born in my heart.

Irina admits that little Misha constantly manipulated her, was obedient only for the sake of profit.

- IN kindergarten Misha began to dress in women's clothing and masturbate in public. He told the teachers that we do not feed him. When he was seven, he told my eldest daughter that it would be better if she had not been born. And when we forbade him to watch cartoons as a punishment, he promised to kill us.

Misha was seen by a neurologist and a psychiatrist, but no medication worked on him. At school, he disrupted lessons and beat his peers. Irina's husband ran out of patience and filed for divorce.

- I took the children and went to Moscow to work. Misha continued to do nasty things on the sly. My feelings for him were in constant disarray: from hatred to love, from the desire to kill to heartbreaking pity. All my chronic diseases have worsened. The depression set in.

According to Irina, Misha could have stolen money from his classmates and spent the funds allocated to him for lunch in a slot machine.

— I had a nervous breakdown. When Misha returned home, in a state of passion, I slapped him a couple of times and pushed him so that he had a subcapsular rupture of the spleen. They called an ambulance. Thank God no surgery was needed. I was scared and realized that I had to abandon the child. Would I break down again? I don't want to go to jail, I still eldest daughter lift up. A few days later I came to visit Misha in the hospital and saw him in a wheelchair (he could not walk for two weeks). She returned home and cut her veins. My roommate saved me. I spent a month in psychiatric clinic. I have severe clinical depression and take antidepressants. My psychiatrist forbade me to communicate with the child in person, because all treatment after that goes down the drain.

After nine years of living in the family, Misha returned to the orphanage. A year and a half later, legally, he is still the son of Irina. The woman believes that the child still does not understand what happened, he sometimes calls her and asks to buy something for him.

- He has such a consumer attitude towards me, as if he is calling the delivery service. After all, I don’t have a division - mine or adopted. For me, everyone is family. It's like I've cut off a piece of myself.

After what happened, Irina decided to find out who Misha's real parents were. It turned out that he had schizophrenics in his family.

- He is a nice boy, very charming, dances well, and he has a developed sense of color, he chooses clothes well. He dressed my daughter for prom. But this is his behavior, heredity crossed everything out. I firmly believed that love is stronger than genetics. It was an illusion. One child destroyed my entire family.

Svetlana, 53 years old

Svetlana's family had three children: own daughter and two adopted children. The two elders left to study in another city, and the youngest adopted son, Ilya, stayed with Svetlana.

- Ilya was six when I took him to me. According to the documents, he was absolutely healthy, but soon I began to notice oddities. I'll make a bed for him - the next morning there is no pillowcase. I ask, where are you going? He does not know. For his birthday, I gave him a huge radio-controlled car. The next day, one wheel was left of her, and she doesn’t know where everything else is.

After several examinations by a neurologist, Ilya was diagnosed with absence epilepsy. The disease is characterized by short-term blackouts of consciousness.

- All this could be dealt with, but at the age of 14, Ilya began to use something, what exactly - I never found out. He started freaking out more than before. Everything in the house was broken and broken: the sink, sofas, chandeliers. If you ask Ilya who did it, there is only one answer: I don’t know, it’s not me. I asked him not to use drugs. She said: finish the ninth grade, then you will go to study in another city, and we will part on a good note. And he: “No, I won’t leave here at all, I’ll bring you.”

After a year of quarrels with her adopted son, Svetlana ended up in the hospital with nervous exhaustion. Then the woman decided to abandon Ilya and returned him to the orphanage.

- A year later, Ilya came to me for the New Year holidays. He asked for forgiveness, said that he did not understand what he was doing, and that now he does not use anything. Then he went back. I don’t know how guardianship works there, but he returned to live with his own alcoholic mother. He already has his own family, a child. His epilepsy never went away, sometimes he gets weird over little things.

Evgenia, 41 years old

Evgenia adopted a child when her own son it was ten. That boy was abandoned by previous adoptive parents, but despite this, Evgenia decided to take him into her family.

- The child made the most positive impression on us: charming, modest, smiling shyly, embarrassed and quietly answering questions. Later, as time passed, we realized that this was just a way to manipulate people. In the eyes of those around him, he always remained a miracle child, no one could believe that there were real problems in communicating with him.

Evgenia began to notice that her adopted son was lagging behind in physical development. Gradually, she began to learn about his chronic diseases.

“The boy began his life in our family by telling a bunch of scary stories about his previous guardians, which at first seemed to us to be quite true. When he was convinced that we believed him, he somehow forgot what he was talking about (a child, after all), and it soon became clear that he simply made up most of the stories. He constantly dressed up as girls, in all games he took female roles, climbed under the covers to his son and tried to hug him, walked around the house, lowering his pants, responding to comments that he was so comfortable. Psychologists said that this is normal, but I could not agree with this, after all, my boyfriend is also growing.

While in the second grade, the boy could not count to ten. Evgenia is a teacher by profession, she constantly worked with her son, they managed to achieve positive results. But communication between mother and son did not go well. The boy lied to the teachers about being bullied at home.

- We got a call from the school to understand what was happening, because we have always been in good standing. And the boy just felt good weak spots those around him and, when he needed to, beat them. He simply brought my son to hysteria: he said that we did not love him, that he would stay with us, and that his son would be sent to an orphanage. He did it on the sly, and for a long time we could not understand what was happening. As a result, the son, secretly from us, hung out in computer clubs, began to steal money. We spent six months to bring him home and bring him to his senses. Its OK now.

The son brought mother Evgenia to heart attack, and ten months later the woman gave her adopted son to rehabilitation center.

- With the advent of the adopted son, the family began to fall apart before our eyes. I realized that I was not ready to sacrifice my son, my mother for the sake of a ghostly hope that everything would be fine. The fact that he was sent to a rehabilitation center, and then they wrote a refusal, the boy was absolutely indifferent. Maybe he's just used to it, or maybe some human feelings have atrophied in him. New guardians were found for him, and he left for another region. Who knows, maybe things will work out there. Although I don't really believe in it.

Anna (name changed)

- My husband and I could not have children (I have incurable problems in the female part) and took the child from orphanage. When we took it, we were 24 years old. The child was 4 years old. He looked like an angel. At first, they could not get enough of him, he was so curly, well-built, smart, compared to his peers from the orphanage (it's no secret that children in the orphanage develop poorly). Of course, we did not choose on principle who is prettier, but this child clearly had a soul. Almost 11 years have passed since then. The child has turned into a monster - GENERALLY does not want to do anything, steals money from us and from classmates. Visits to the director have become a tradition for me. I don’t work, I dedicated my life to the child, I spent all the time with him, I tried to be a good, fair mother ... it didn’t work out. I told him the word - he told me "go to ***, you are not my mother / yes you are ***** / yes, what do you understand in my life." I don't have the strength anymore, I don't know how to influence him. My husband has retired from education, he says that I should figure it out myself, because (I quote) “I am afraid that if I start talking to him, I will hit him.” In general, I saw no way out but to give it back. And yes. If this was my child, dear, I would have done exactly the same.

Natalia Stepanova

- Little Slavka fell in love with me right away. The lonely and shy kid stood out from the crowd of children in the social center for helping children. We took him on the first day we met. However, two weeks later the alarm was sounded. Outwardly calm and kind boy suddenly began to show aggression towards pets. First, Slava hung the newborn kittens in the kitchen, after wrapping them with wire. Then small dogs became the object of his attention. As a result, at least 13 ruined lives were on the account of the juvenile murderer. When a series of these cruel acts began, we immediately turned to a child psychologist. At the reception, the specialist reassured us and advised us to devote more time to Slava and make it clear that we love him. We agreed and in the summer we went to the village, away from the noisy city. But there the situation got even worse. At the next consultation, the psychologist explained to us that Slavka needed specialized help. And since I am in a position, we decided that it would be better to send our son back to the orphanage. We hoped to the last that the boy's aggression would soon pass, and with it the desire to kill. The last straw of patience was the three bodies of torn puppies. As if according to the script of a horror movie, once again taking advantage of the absence of adults, the kid alone brutally beat the four-legged animals to death.

Adoption procedure

An adopted child can be transferred to a family only by a court decision. The adoption procedure is quite complicated and lengthy, involving a lot of paperwork and requiring a lot of time and perseverance from potential parents. If the child reaches the age of 10, necessary condition is his consent.

Requirements for parents

There are a number of strict restrictions for potential adoptive parents, including for health reasons and age. Also, when considering the issue of adoption, the court takes into account the financial situation of the parents, the availability of sufficient living space. For foreign citizens, the adoption procedure is the only way to adopt a child from Russia into the family.

Rights and obligations of parents

From a legal point of view, a child after adoption is equated to blood, and parents bear full responsibility for it. They have the opportunity to give the child their last name, change the first name, patronymic, and in some cases the date of birth. interests of the child and new family designed to protect the secrecy of adoption, the law establishes punishment for its disclosure against the will of the adoptive parents. Guardianship authorities are required to monitor the family annually for at least three years after adoption.

Parental cash and child benefits

The state does not provide additional assistance to the family, except for the provision of post-natal leave to the mother and payments in connection with the birth of a child if an infant under three months old is adopted. Cash benefit for adopted child equal to the statutory blood child allowance. After adoption, the child receives all the rights of a relative, including property, but at the same time loses the benefits that he had as an orphan (for example, the right to receive housing from the state after reaching 18 years of age, benefits when entering educational establishments etc.).

An adopted child is equalized in rights with natural children, it is possible to remove him from the family only if the parents are deprived of parental rights.

How to apply for an adoption?

You want to adopt a child, but do not know where to turn and how to start this procedure. First you need to contact the guardianship and guardianship authority, which is located at your place of residence.

You need to come to the guardianship authority with a passport or other document proving your identity and confirming your place of residence in this locality. If you are or are married, please bring your marriage certificate with you. A PLO specialist will talk with you, tell you about the adoption procedure and its consequences, and name the documents that need to be drawn up for adoption.

The main documents are:

• A medical report on the state of health, drawn up on a special form with a list of specialists you must visit.
• Documents confirming family income: either a certificate from the place of work indicating the position and wages(for employees), or a duly certified copy of the income tax return.
• Documents on living conditions: a copy of the financial and personal account and an extract from the house (apartment) book, if the housing is municipal. If the housing is privatized or privately owned, then the documents confirming the ownership of the residential premises: a contract of sale, a certificate of registration of ownership.
• Certificate from the Department of Internal Affairs (OVD) on the absence of a criminal record. You will also be asked to write an application in the prescribed form and an autobiography.

Specialists will study the documents, check your living conditions and issue a conclusion on the possibility of being an adoptive parent. This document gives you the right to start looking for a child.

• Custody / guardianship

guardianship

guardianship- the form of placement of minor citizens (under the age of fourteen), in which the citizens (guardians) appointed by the guardianship and guardianship authority are the legal representatives of the wards and perform all legally significant actions on their behalf and in their interests;

guardianship- a form of placement of minors between the ages of fourteen and eighteen years, in which the citizens (custodians) appointed by the guardianship and guardianship body are obliged to assist minors in the exercise of their rights and obligations, to protect minors from abuse by third parties, and also to give consent of an adult ward to commit actions in accordance with Article 33 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation.

Guardian's allowance and child benefits

The duties of guardianship and trusteeship are performed by the guardian (custodian) free of charge. The state pays monthly funds for the maintenance of the child, in accordance with the standard established in the region. IN Samara region currently the payment is 6844 rubles for each child.

The guardian receives a monthly allowance for the child established by law, and the guardianship and guardianship authorities are obliged to regularly monitor the conditions of maintenance, upbringing and education of the child, to facilitate the organization of his education, recreation and treatment. After reaching the age of 18, the child retains the right to receive housing in case of his absence. Children under guardianship or guardianship have the right to:

• upbringing in the family of a guardian or custodian, care on the part of the guardian or custodian, living together with him, except for the cases provided for in paragraph 2 of Article 36 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation;
• providing them with conditions for maintenance, upbringing, education, comprehensive development and respect for their human dignity;
• alimony, pensions, allowances and other social payments due to them;
• retaining the right of ownership to a dwelling or the right to use a dwelling, and in the absence of a dwelling, they have the right to receive a dwelling in accordance with housing legislation;
• protection from abuse by a guardian or trustee.

Features of guardianship or guardianship:

• guardianship or guardianship is established legal act local self-government bodies (order) until the child reaches the age of majority;
• guardianship or trusteeship may be established for a certain period;
• money is paid for the maintenance of the child under guardianship;
• annually, guardians or custodians must provide a report on the storage, use of the property of the ward and on the management of such property;
• guardianship and guardianship authorities exercise regular control (supervision) over the conditions of maintenance, upbringing and education of the child;
• guardianship and guardianship authorities assist the guardian in organizing education, recreation and treatment of the ward;
• parents are not released from the obligation to support the child and must pay alimony;
• a child placed under guardianship or guardianship retains the right to the alimony, pension, allowances and other social payments due to him;
• the appearance of a candidate for adoption of a child is possible;
• returning the child to the parents.
• the transfer of a child into custody is not a secret protected by law;
• the relatives of the child have the right to communicate with him.

Requirements for the Appointment of a Guardian or Trustee
1. Guardians and Trustees Only adults of legal capacity may be appointed. Citizens deprived of parental rights, as well as citizens who, at the time of establishing guardianship or guardianship, have a conviction for an intentional crime against the life or health of citizens, cannot be appointed guardians and trustees.
2. When appointing a guardian (trustee) to a child, the moral and other personal qualities of the guardian (trustee), his ability to perform the duties of a guardian (trustee), the relationship between the guardian (trustee) and the child, the attitude towards the child of family members of the guardian (trustee), and also the desire of the child himself.
3. Persons suffering from chronic alcoholism or drug addiction, persons suspended from the duties of guardians (trustees), persons limited in parental rights, former adoptive parents, if the adoption is canceled due to their fault, as well as persons who, for health reasons, cannot fulfill the duties of raising a child.

The list of diseases in the presence of which a person cannot adopt a child, take him under guardianship (guardianship), take him into a foster family
(approved by Decree of the Government of the Russian Federation of 01.05.1996 N 542)

• Tuberculosis (active and chronic) of all forms of localization in patients with I, II, V groups of dispensary registration
• Diseases internal organs, nervous system, musculoskeletal system in the stage of decompensation
• Malignant oncological diseases of all localizations
• Drug addiction, substance abuse, alcoholism
• Infectious diseases before deregistration
• Mental illnesses in which patients are recognized in the prescribed manner as incapacitated or partially incapacitated
• All diseases and injuries that led to disability of groups I and II, precluding working capacity

In what cases can a child be assigned a guardian or custodian?
The child may be appointed guardian if:

• death of parents (declaration of parents as dead, which is made by the court, according to legal consequences, is equated to death);
• deprivation of their parental rights;
• restrictions on their parental rights;
• recognition of parents as incompetent;
• illness of parents;
• prolonged absence of parents;
• evasion of parents from raising children or protecting their rights and interests;
• refusal of parents to take their children from educational, medical institutions, institutions social protection population and other similar institutions;
• stay of parents (parent) in places of deprivation of liberty.
• the birth of a child in persons under the age of 16 (Article 62 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation)
• for other reasons, recognizing a child as left without parental care in the manner prescribed by the legislation of the Russian Federation

Departments dealing with issues of guardianship or guardianship:

on the territory of the Avtozavodsky district 16 Ordzhonikidze boulevard, tel. 54-44-29;
- department for the implementation of guardianship and guardianship on the territory of the Central and Komsomolsky districts Department of Family Affairs, Guardianship and Guardianship of the City Hall of Togliatti, located at: b-r Lenina, 15, tel. 54-38-57;
- Department of Identification and Arrangement of Minors of the Department for Family Affairs, Guardianship and Guardianship of the Mayor's Office of Togliatti, located at: st. Mira, 43, tel. 54-30-28.

Grounds for termination of guardianship and guardianship

The grounds for termination of guardianship and guardianship are provided for in Art. 39 and 40 of the Civil Code of the Russian Federation. All bases can be divided into three groups:
1. "Automatic" termination:

• the achievement by a minor of 14 years of age terminates guardianship, the achievement of 18 years of age terminates guardianship;
• the entry of a minor into marriage terminates guardianship;
• the emancipation of a minor terminates guardianship;
• the achievement of the age of majority or the acquisition of full civil capacity by a minor parent terminates custody of his child;

2. Release of the guardian or trustee from the performance of duties:

• release from performance of duties in the presence of valid reasons;
• return of the minor to his parents;
• adoption of a minor;
• placement of the ward in an appropriate educational institution, institution of social protection of the population or other similar institution (not a mandatory basis for all cases).

3. Suspension of a guardian or custodian.

• performance by the guardian (custodian) of powers for personal gain;
• leaving the ward without supervision and necessary assistance;
• other improper performance by the guardian or custodian of his duties.

foster family

foster family- form of family placement of children; combines the features of a children's institution, guardianship and adoption; a foster family can be a solution to the problem of employment of parents. This is a form of raising a child (children) at home with a foster parent. This form family arrangement has been legalized since 1996 by the Family Code of the Russian Federation.

The procedure for creating a foster family

A foster family is formed on the basis of an agreement on the transfer of a child for upbringing, which is concluded by the guardianship and guardianship authority with foster parents.

The transfer of the child to the family takes into account his opinion and with the consent of the administration of the children's institution in which he is. The transfer of a child who has reached the age of 10 is carried out with his consent. In practice, difficulties often arise when registering a child with a family living in another district or city. The fact is that payments for the maintenance of the child are made from the budget of the district where he was registered.
Bodies considering the placement of children in a foster family:
- Department for the organization of activities for guardianship, guardianship and adoption Tolyatti, st. Golosova, d. 99, room. 8, tel. 54-37-69.
- Department of identification and placement of minors Department of Family Affairs, Guardianship and Guardianship of the Mayor's Office of the Togliatti City District at the address: Togliatti, b-r Lenina, 15, tel. 54-33-14, 54-44-69.

Status of the child and his age

There are no restrictions on placing a child in a family. It is possible to place a child with poor health, developmental disabilities, or a disabled child in a foster family. Children with siblings are usually placed in the same family.

Requirements for adoptive parents

Adoptive parents may be adults of both sexes, with the exception of persons recognized by the court as incapable or with limited capacity; deprived of parental rights or limited by the court in parental rights; dismissed from the duties of a guardian (custodian) for improper performance of the duties assigned to him by law; former adoptive parents, if the adoption is canceled by the court due to their fault; having diseases in the presence of which it is impossible to take a child to be brought up.

Rights and obligations of adoptive parents

These are the legal representatives of the child, who are obliged to educate him, take care of his health, development, create conditions for him to receive an education, and prepare him for an independent life. In such a family there can be up to eight children, including biological ones. A child in a foster family has the right to maintain contact with biological parents and relatives.

Cash payments to foster parents and benefits for the child

Adults get paid. For the maintenance of each child, they are paid funds for food, clothes, shoes and other needs. A child placed in a foster family retains the right to alimony, a pension (on the occasion of loss of a breadwinner, disability) and other payments and benefits in accordance with the law, including receiving housing upon reaching the age of 18.
The state pays monthly funds for the maintenance of the child, in accordance with the standard established in the region. In the Samara region, the payment is currently 6,844 rubles for each child.
The foster family enjoys the priority right to receive vouchers for children (including free ones) to sanatoriums, health camps, and rest homes.

Further device of the child

A child placed in a foster family, if he has the appropriate status and if a candidate appears who wants to adopt him, may be transferred to the adoptive parent by a court decision.

How to create a foster family?

The list of documents and the procedure for finding a child are the same as for adoption and guardianship. If you have a desire to take one or more children (but not more than eight) for upbringing, then you need to contact the guardianship and guardianship authority at your place of residence with a statement in which you ask for an opinion on the possibility of being foster parents.

After examining the submitted documents, on the basis of an act of examining the living conditions of your family, the guardianship and guardianship authority, within 20 days from the date of application, prepares a conclusion on the possibility of becoming a foster parent. This is the basis for the selection of a child for the purpose of his transfer to a foster family.

After you have made a decision that the child will live with you, write an application with a request to transfer him to the family, attach to it a conclusion on the possibility of being a foster parent. After that, an agreement is concluded on the transfer of the child for upbringing to a foster family between the guardianship and guardianship authority at the place of residence (location) of the child and the adoptive parents.

The contract also provides for the payment of foster parents. But the amount of payment is determined by the regional law on the remuneration of foster parents. Children are paid funds for their maintenance.

Wards and adopted children, unlike adopted children, enjoy benefits that are provided for by both federal and regional laws. These may be educational benefits, medical service, purchasing vouchers, getting housing if the child does not have it.

• Atronate / Mentoring

patronage

patronage- family form of placement, providing for the temporary transfer of the child to a specially trained family; the main purpose of this form is the socialization of the child, gaining experience of life in the family; patronage can be a solution to the problem of employment of parents.

Procedure for placing a child in a family

It is established on the basis of the conclusion of an agreement between foster parents, guardianship and guardianship authorities and a children's institution (or an authorized service) on the division of powers and responsibilities for the child.

Status of the child and his age

A child is transferred to patronage, regardless of his age, status and condition, who temporarily needs a foster family or special conditions for his support and accompaniment.

Requirements for foster carers

Foster education is professional work Therefore, the requirements for a teacher are similar to the requirements for a teacher in an orphanage. A foster caregiver - actually an employee of an orphanage - must undergo special training, and also be ready to cooperate with specialists, discuss emerging problems, and, if necessary, to change their lifestyle in the interests of the child.

Rights and obligations of patronage educators

Patronage can be short-term (from one day to six months) and long-term (from six months or more). The patronage educator is obliged to carry out the plan developed by specialists to protect the rights of the child. At the same time, specialists from the orphanage or authorized service provide psychological, pedagogical and medical and social support for the child and family. The child maintains contact with biological parents and relatives.

Cash payments to foster carers and benefits for the child

Adults receive a salary, they are credited with seniority, they are granted leave in accordance with labor legislation. They are also paid a child support allowance, earmarked funds for repairs, purchase of furniture, etc. Children retain all the benefits due to their status.

Further device of the child

He may be removed from the foster family by decision of the parties. If it is not possible to give a child up for adoption, short-term patronage usually turns into a long-term one. Often he remains in the same family, that is, patronage is used as a transitional form for guardianship or adoption after the child receives the appropriate status. When transferring for adoption, the priority right is given to the foster caregiver in whose family he is brought up.

Mentoring

Mentoring- it is also called a weekend family, a vacation family: the child is taken to the family for a while, and then returned to the orphanage; the main purpose of this form is the socialization of the child, gaining experience of life in the family

Family placement procedure

It is established by concluding an agreement between the family and the children's institution on the division of powers and responsibilities for the child. The desire of the child when placing in a family is necessarily taken into account.

Status of the child and his age

Such a form, according to experts, can be useful only for older children who are able to consciously perceive the situation - it provides invaluable experience of living in a family, communication and support of friendly adults. But for a child under 11-12 years old who dreams of a family, father and mother, returning to an orphanage can be a serious trauma.

Requirements for mentors

The requirements for them are less stringent than for foster caregivers. However, they must receive special training, and also be ready to cooperate with specialists, to discuss emerging problems.

Rights and obligations of mentors

Adults are required to comply with a plan developed by specialists to protect their rights while they have a child.

Further device of the child

Mentoring a child can be a stepping stone to another form of arrangement, such as long-term foster care or adoption, if the child's status allows it. Even if this does not happen, staying in a family, as a rule, has a positive effect on the child, because for him it is an opportunity to stay outside the walls of the children's institution for some time, expand his social circle, and make friends.

The happiness of being a parent is incomparable. To be close to your baby from the first seconds of his life, to see his first uncertain and cautious steps, to hear stupid and funny words...

But what about those whom nature has deprived of this happiness - to be a mom or a dad? Don't despair. In such a situation, there is still a chance to become happy parent- Adopt a child. A single woman or a man, or even entire families who do not have their own children, will thus be able not only to help themselves, but also to give happy childhood a child who is unlucky in life.

What is adoption

In the Russian Federation, to adopt a child means to take him to yourself, to your family, under your roof. Give him, in addition to his last name, also affection, and love, and care.

When adopting between a child and newly-made parents, the same rights and obligations arise as in ordinary families with consanguinity. But whether there will be the same love depends on you.

So, how to adopt a child from a maternity hospital or from an orphanage? What needs to be done and where to go? This is a rather lengthy procedure, and it consists of several mandatory steps.

Stage One: Become Adoptive Parents

First, you need to apply to the guardianship authority in the place where you live. Only there you can get permission to adopt a child. Documents to be submitted:

a) an application of the established form;

b) a certificate of income or a document from the place of permanent work, which indicates the position you hold and salary;

c) certificate of ownership of the real estate(housing) or an extract made from;

d) a copy of your financial account;

e) a medical certificate of the established form, which is issued to citizens who wish to become adoptive parents;

e) a certificate confirming that you have no criminal record;

g) autobiography;

h) marriage certificate (copy) for citizens who are in it.

All documents listed above must be issued maximum 1 year ago. In addition to the medical certificate, which is valid for 3 months. When submitting documents, you must present a passport or other identity card).

What do you need to adopt a child, in addition to submitting the documents listed above? Good living conditions. After all, employees of the guardianship authority will visit you to check how you live. And they will conclude whether you are able to provide the unborn child with a normal existence.

Then, within 15 days (working days) from the day the application was submitted, the guardianship authority must draw up a conclusion on whether you can become adoptive parents. In case of a positive result, you will be given an appropriate document, which is valid for one year, and will be registered with citizens who are adoptive parents. In case of refusal, you will also be sent an appropriate conclusion and all documents will be returned within five days.

Stage two: choose a child

In the event that you received a positive response and are registered, the guardianship authority will tell you how to adopt a child from a maternity hospital or from an orphanage. After that, you will be provided with all the information about the children who are allowed to be adopted. You have the right to receive detailed and accurate information about your child, including whether the child has any relatives. If you wish, you can contact any medical institution to conduct an examination of the child.

Then the guardianship authorities will issue a referral to visit the child you have chosen at the place of residence. This document is valid for ten days and applies to one child visit only. In the event that by good reasons the deadline has been missed, it can be extended only upon the relevant application.

After receiving the referral, you can safely go to a meeting with the child to get to know him, communicate, study his documents and medical report about his health. The latter must be done under the signature.

Then you must notify the guardianship authority in writing about how you visited the child and what decision you made on his account. This must also be done within a ten-day period while the issued referral is valid.

If you decide for some reason to refuse to accept the proposed child into your family, you are entitled to receive another referral to visit another applicant.

How to get information from databanks

All orphans who are allowed to be adopted in accordance with the law are listed in regional and federal data banks. To obtain the relevant information, the following documents must be submitted:

a) a copy of your passport, birth certificate or other document that proves your identity;

b) the conclusion issued by the guardianship authority that you can be an adoptive parent;

c) a statement requesting the provision of information and the selection of a child that meets your wishes;

d) a questionnaire.

The application with the documents attached to it is considered within a ten-day period. The guardianship authority is obliged once a month to send out new questionnaires for children that meet your wishes. Fifteen days are given for their study.

Stage Three: Court Approval

Officially and legally, it is possible to adopt a baby or an older child in our country only through a court. Reason to start judicial trial- application for adoption. It is filed with the court at the place of residence of the adopted child.

The application must be duly completed and the following documents must be attached to it:

a) if you are not married - a birth certificate (copy), if you are - a marriage certificate (copy);

b) a certificate issued by a medical institution on the state of health;

c) income statement;

d) for real estate (housing) or an extract made from the house book;

e) a document confirming that you are registered as an adoptive parent.

All of the above documents must be submitted to the court in two copies. The meeting on this issue is closed and takes place in the presence of a prosecutor, an employee of the guardianship authority and a child who is already fourteen years old. Your appearance in court is required. From the moment the court decision comes into force, within 3 days a copy of this decision will be sent to the registry office for registration of adoption at the state level.

Step Four: Making an Adoption

The last thing you need to adopt a child is to legalize everything. This is done by the registry office. In order to register an adoption, you need to write an application or apply orally. To do this, you need to present your passport and a positive court decision. If within a month you do not do this yourself, then the registration of the adoption will be carried out by the registry office independently on the basis of a court document.

The registry office issues a new birth certificate for the child, where the columns "mother" and "father" will already contain your names. However, if the child is left with the biological parents, no changes will be made to the birth record.

Now you have the right to personally pick up your child already. But do not forget, within 10 days from the date of the positive decision by the court, to notify the guardianship authority in which you are registered.

How to adopt a child from a maternity hospital

It is much more difficult to take a baby from a maternity hospital than from shelters or baby houses. The fact is that in our country there are much more couples who want to adopt a newborn child than those who are ready to accept older children into their families.

The guardianship authorities, as well as the courts, treat such adoptive parents with increased attention.

So, the main requirement for this procedure is the age difference between the future parent and the child of at least 16 years.

The declaration of desire to become an adoptive parent must be notarized.

In addition to meeting all of the above requirements, you must undergo a full medical examination for the presence of mental disorders, skin and sexually transmitted diseases, oncology and disorders of the nervous system.

Who cannot be an adoptive parent

1) persons recognized in judicial order limited or incapacitated;

2) spouses, if one of them is incapacitated or has limited legal capacity;

3) persons deprived by the court of parental rights;

4) persons who, due to their health, are unable to perform parental duties;

5) former adoptive parents, if earlier the adoption was canceled by the court due to their fault;

6) citizens removed from guardianship in a judicial proceeding;

7) unemployed or low-income citizens who are not able to provide a living wage for an adopted child;

8) persons previously convicted of serious crimes;

9) persons without a fixed place of residence;

10) citizens who live in premises that do not meet technical and sanitary standards.

money question

The amount of payments depends on many factors: where you live, whether you work, how old the adopted child is, etc.

Which is paid upon adoption of a child, is 8,000 rubles. This is a general federal benefit. There are also separate lump-sum payments in the Moscow region: for each child - 20,000 rubles. If you adopt another baby under the age of six months, you will receive an allowance of 5,000. For the third - 15,000. For each subsequent - 20,000 rubles.

If you do not work and adopt a child under three months old, you also receive benefits. These are payments in the amount of the average monthly salary calculated for the last 12 months worked.

Adoption Mystery

Many try to adopt a child under one year old, because they think that in this way it is easier to hide this "terrible" secret. Others, on the contrary, do not believe that there is something shameful in this, and from the very childhood they reveal the whole truth to the adopted baby.

According to Russian law, all those who are aware of the adoption procedure (employees of the guardianship authorities, the registry office, the judge who made the decision, and others) are required to keep this secret. Responsibility comes for its disclosure: from a fine of 80,000 rubles to arrest for four months.

However, any person who has reached the age of 18 has the right to receive in the court archive all information about his adoption, as well as about real parents.

Introduction: guardianship or foster care

With varieties of forms of family structure in Russian legislation everything is much easier than it seems. And it seems that everything is complicated, mainly because the media confuses us. Incompetent journalists call all children who have found parents indiscriminately “adopted”, and all families who have taken such children for upbringing are called “adopted”. Whereas in reality, foster parents do not adopt children, but take them under guardianship. But reporters have no time to understand such subtleties - so they form one stereotype after another.

By by and large, there are only two types of family arrangement in Russia - adoption and guardianship. Legal relations between adults and a child during adoption are regulated mainly by the Family Code of the Russian Federation, and during guardianship (as well as guardianship and foster family) - Civil Code. Custody differs from guardianship by the age of the child (over 14 years old), and foster family is a paid form of guardianship when the guardian receives remuneration for his work. In other words: the creation of a foster family is always based on the registration of guardianship or guardianship of a child. Therefore, for ease of perception, further the phrases “foster family” and “foster parent”, as well as “guardianship” and “trustee” will only occur where it is impossible to do without them. In all other cases - "guardianship" and "guardian".

Despite the fact that adoption is considered a priority form of family placement in the Russian Federation, today more and more citizens who want to adopt a child with a difficult fate into their family choose guardianship and its derivatives. Why? based on the interests of the child. After all in the case of registration of guardianship, the child retains his orphan status, and, consequently, all the benefits, payments and other benefits due from the state.

Choosing between adoption and guardianship, many parents put the material side of the issue at the forefront. In many regions, adoptive parents receive substantial lump-sum payments. For example, residents of the Kaliningrad region can receive 615,000 rubles to purchase a dwelling on the right of ownership of an adopted child. And in the Pskov region they give out 500 thousand rubles without any restrictions on their use. And not only to Pskov residents, but to adoptive parents from any region.

In addition, since 2013, when adopting sisters and brothers, or disabled children or adolescents over 10 years old, the state pays parents 100 thousand rubles at a time. And if the adopted child is the second in the family, then the parents can also apply for maternal capital. All these payments are a good help to improve the living conditions of the family. But, as mentioned earlier, an orphan in the case of adoption becomes an ordinary Russian child, losing all "orphan capital", including their own housing.

On the other hand, for a child, especially an older child, it is extremely important to realize that he is not “custodial”, but adopted - that is, he has become a family not only in the hearts of loved ones, but also documented. However, quite often it is simply impossible to prefer adoption: if there are restrictions on the forms of family arrangement. So, if the baby's biological parents are not deprived of parental rights, but only limited in them, then only two forms of arrangement will be possible for the child: guardianship (guardianship) or a foster family.

Choosing between paid and free form guardianship, many wealthy families choose the second option - they say, why should we receive a reward for raising a child, we will raise him for free. Meanwhile, this small (3-5 thousand rubles a month, depending on the region) money can be used to create the child’s own savings - after all, no one bothers to open a replenishable deposit in the name of your ward, and form a decent amount by his age: for a wedding , study, first car, etc.

Guardianship or foster family? The choice always remains with those adults who make the responsible decision to accept a child with a difficult fate into their family. The main thing is that this choice should be made in the name of the child and in defense of his interests.

Who can become a guardian and what is the SPR

The question in the title of this section could be answered briefly: "any adult capable citizen of the Russian Federation." If not for some "exceptions".

So, before collecting documents for registration of guardianship, make sure that you do not:

1) have been deprived of parental rights.

2) were limited in parental rights.

3) were suspended from performing the duties of a guardian (custodian).

4) were the adopter and the adoption was canceled due to your fault.

5) you have an unexpunged or outstanding conviction for grave or especially grave crimes.

6)* have or had a criminal record, or are or have been prosecuted for crimes against life and health, freedom, honor and dignity of a person (with the exception of illegal placement in a psychiatric hospital, slander and insult), sexual integrity and sexual freedom of a person, as well as for crimes against the family and minors, public health and public morality and public safety(* - this item can be ignored if criminal prosecution terminated on exonerating grounds).

7) are married to a person of the same sex registered in any state where such a marriage is permitted, or are not married to a person of the opposite sex, being a citizen of the said state.

8) suffer from chronic alcoholism or drug addiction

9) cannot exercise parental rights due to health reasons**.

10) live together with persons suffering from diseases that pose a danger to others***.

** - lists of these diseases can be found in Appendix 2
*** - lists of these diseases can be found in Appendix 2

Another important point without the “not” particle: a citizen applying for the high rank of guardian must undergo psychological, pedagogical and legal training - have a certificate from the School of Adoptive Parents (SPR).

What does the training in the PDS give in addition to the desired certificate? Schools of host parents set themselves many tasks, the first of which is to help candidates for guardians in determining their readiness to accept a child, in realizing the real problems and difficulties that they will face in the process of raising a child. In addition, the SDS identifies and develops in citizens the educational and parenting skills necessary, including for protecting the rights and health of the child, creating a safe environment for him, successful socialization, education and development of the child.

However, you will not be obligated to undergo training at the SPR if you (in accordance with Article 146 of the Family Code of the Russian Federation):

You are or were an adoptive parent and the adoption has not been canceled for you.

Are or have been a guardian (custodian), and have not been suspended from the performance of the duties assigned to you

A close relative of the child****.

**** - read about the benefits of close relatives in Appendix 3

Education at the School of Adoptive Parents - free. The guardianship and guardianship authorities of your region should take care of this, and they will also issue a referral to the SPR. In the process of completing the program, which, by the way, must be approved by the Ministry of Education and Science, you may be offered to undergo a psychological examination - pay attention - with your consent. The results of this survey are advisory in nature and are taken into account when appointing a guardian, together with:

Moral and other personal qualities of the guardian;

The ability of the guardian to perform his duties;

The relationship between the guardian and the child;

The attitude towards the child of the family members of the guardian;

The attitude of the child himself to the prospect of upbringing in the family offered to him (if this is possible due to his age and intelligence).

The desire of the child to see a certain person as his guardian.

The degree of relationship (aunt / nephews, grandmother / grandson, brother / sister, etc.), property (daughter-in-law / mother-in-law), former property (former stepmother / former stepson), etc.

We collect documents

Are you sure none of the exceptions or circumstances listed in the previous chapter prevent you from becoming a guardian? Then it remains to prove this to the guardianship and guardianship authorities by providing them with information about yourself.

If you want to get guardianship as soon as possible (and most host parents want just that), then it’s better not to wait until guardianship and guardianship specialists request information from the Ministry of Internal Affairs, the Ministry of Justice, medical and other organizations. Start acting on your own: collecting documents can be done in parallel with training at the PDS. The necessary forms can be obtained from specialists in guardianship and guardianship, or you can print it yourself.

There are not so many documents separating you from the conclusion of the guardianship and guardianship authority on the possibility of being a guardian. Another question is that some of the "papers" are given dozens of hours of queues in different institutions. Therefore, to save time and nerves, it is extremely important to understand what documents need to be dealt with in the first place.

So, when collecting documents, it is advisable to adhere to the following order:

1. Medical opinion. This item requires most explanations. First, a medical examination of potential guardians is carried out for free. If any of the healthcare institutions in your city do not agree with this, you can safely refer to the order of the Ministry of Health of the Russian Federation No. 332 of September 10, 1996. Secondly, the same order also introduced form No. 164 / y-96, on which you have to collect two dozen seals and stamps. In total, it provides for the conclusions of eight specialist doctors - a narcologist, a psychiatrist, a dermatovenereologist, an oncologist, a neuropathologist, an infectious disease specialist, a therapist - plus the signature of the head physician of the clinic at the place of your registration. As a rule, all doctors meet halfway, and put their “not detected” as quickly as possible. At the same time, as in any bureaucracy, incidents are possible. So, in some cities, they will not be allowed to see a narcologist and a psychiatrist before undergoing a fluorography. And without the stamps of these specialists, the infectious disease specialist will refuse to talk to you, whose test results have to wait up to two weeks. It is advisable to ask about all this those who have already undergone such a medical examination in your region. And plan the “chain” that is optimal in terms of time and logic.

2. Help from information center MIA(no criminal record, etc.). The police have the right to produce this document within a month, but, as a rule, they also work more quickly when the request is made by the future guardian - especially if you have been registered in one subject of the Russian Federation all your life.

3. Income statement for 12 months. Much here depends on the accountant at your place of work, and financiers, as you know, are wayward and focused people. They may also delay the issuance of a 2-personal income tax statement if the quarterly report does not allow you to be distracted by such trifles. Therefore, it is better to request a document in advance. If you do not have an income (only one spouse works), then the personal income tax of the husband / wife will do. Or any other document confirming income (for example, a bank statement of account movements).

4.Document from public utilities - HOA / DEZ / UK - at the place of registration. A copy of the financial personal account or other document confirming the right to use the residential premises or the right of ownership to it.

5. Written consent of all adult family members to accept the child into the family(taking into account the views of children living with you who have reached the age of 10). Written in free form.

6. Autobiography. The usual resume will do: born, studied, career, awards and titles.

7. Copy of marriage certificate(if you are married).

8. Copy of pension certificate(SNILS).

9. Certificate of completion of training and (SPR).

10. Application for the appointment of a guardian.

In some regions of Russia, the entire package of documents can be sent via the Internet using the Unified Portal of Public Services. But it is better, of course, to bring the documents in person, taking your passport with you. And get acquainted with those specialists of the guardianship and guardianship authority, who will subsequently congratulate you on the addition to the family.

Please note: absolutely all documents, their copies and other information necessary for establishing guardianship are provided for free. The "shelf life" of the most important documents (points 2-4) is one year. The medical report is valid for six months.

Communicating with guardianship authorities

So, your package of documents is in the guardianship and guardianship authorities. But even if all the documents are perfect, in order to register you, the last document is not enough, which the specialists will produce themselves after a visit to your home. This visit must take place within 7 days after the submission of the main package of documents. It's about on the act of examining the living conditions of a citizen who has expressed a desire to become a guardian.

In this act, the guardianship and guardianship authority evaluates “the living conditions, personal qualities and motives of the applicant, his ability to raise a child, and the relationships that have developed between family members.” In practice, it looks like this: experts come to visit you, and, inspecting the housing, ask additional questions and fill out their form, where they make the necessary notes. To curry favor with experts or, conversely, to stand in a pose, annoyed by the interference of outsiders in privacy, makes no sense. Just tell it like it is. If there are obvious shortcomings (for example, lack of space for activities, toys) - share plans for how you are going to fix it. The truth is always the best choice.

It happens that the specialists of the guardianship authorities are not satisfied with the footage of living space per child. Sometimes the "crowding" is imaginary: when the number of people registered in the apartment exceeds the number of citizens actually living. It is easy to prove this by providing additional documents confirming the residence of the “absent” at other addresses. If there are really few meters (the standards for the minimum living space in each region and municipality are different, and tend to increase), but the conditions for the child are comfortable, then the guardianship and guardianship authority must proceed from the interests of the child. It would be useful to recall the December presidential decree “On certain measures to implement public policy in the field of protection of orphans and children left without parental care”. It talks about lowering the requirements for the standard area of ​​​​living space when placing children for upbringing in a family. If this does not help, the approved survey report can be challenged in court.

The examination certificate is drawn up within 3 days, after which it is approved by the authorities, and sent to you - within another 3 days. And only after that, the guardianship and guardianship body connects the entire package of documents and issues a conclusion on the possibility of a citizen to be a guardian. This may take up to 10 days. In case of a positive decision, this conclusion will become the basis for registration - an entry in the journal is made within 3 more days.

Conclusion on the possibility of being a guardian is a document valid for two whole years throughout Russia. With it, you can apply to any guardianship and guardianship authority or to any regional operator Federal database with a request for the selection of a child. Based on the same conclusion, the guardianship and guardianship authority at the place of residence of the child will draw up an act on the appointment of you as a guardian.

We are looking for a child and arrange custody

We have repeatedly talked about how to find “your” baby (or not a baby at all). If you intend to take a child into your family in your region, you can search officially, through the regional operator of the Federal Database (FBD). But if you are ready to go for a child even across the whole country, and look for him everywhere at the same time, this option will not work, because you will not be able to apply to the second operator until the first one fulfills your request. In addition, the search using regional operators is designed so that you need to select a number of parameters - the age of the child, the color of the eyes and hair, the presence of brothers and sisters, etc.

In practice, many happy and successful adoptive parents ended up taking into the family not at all the children they planned to find. Everything was decided by the visual image of the child - once they saw a video or photo, the parents could no longer think about anyone else, and completely forgot about those preferences that they fantasized for themselves. So, babies with "unpopular" eye and hair colors, with bouquets of diseases, along with brothers and sisters, left for families. After all, the heart does not understand the FBD parameters.

You can not only see, but also hear the voice of your unborn child in the database of video questionnaires "Change one life" - the largest in Russia. In a short video you will see how a child plays, moves, what he can do and hear what he lives and dreams about.

After the child is found, you are obliged to get to know him and establish contact, and you also have the right to familiarize yourself with documents from the child’s personal file and study the medical report on his state of health. To do this, you need to send an application to the relevant regional operator and fill out a questionnaire. Within 10 days, you will be given information about the child. And if you are ready to go further - referral to acquaintance.

Suppose everything ended well: you visited the child several times, perhaps even asked him for a short walk, and established the very “contact” that was mentioned in the direction. Then the most important thing remained: to issue an act on the appointment of a guardian.

This act is attention! - issued by the guardianship and guardianship authority place of residence of the child. If the boarding school or orphanage where the child is being raised is far away, try to negotiate with specialists so that they try to accept the application and draw up the act in one day - otherwise you will have to travel to a remote locality twice.

If everything goes well, you will be invited to the guardianship and guardianship authority to receive the act and certificate of the guardian, and the institution will prepare the child and his documents.

Getting ready for a new life

So, we can congratulate you: you have been issued a guardian's certificate, and the child leaves the boarding school and goes to a family!

Together with the child, you will be given a couple of kilograms of documents from his personal file* against signature. Do not rush to put them in folders: at home you will only have a part of the documents: the student file (if any) will go to school, and the rest will go to the archive of the guardianship and guardianship authority at your current place of residence(registration) where you have yet to register.

* - you can find the list of the child's documents in Appendix 4

In the same place, you will write an application for the payment of a lump sum to you (today it ranges from 12.4 to 17.5 thousand rubles - depending on the region) and, if you wish, an application for the creation of a foster family. After you register, you have to perform a number of actions - such as opening a current account in the name of the child (obtaining a Savings Book), temporary registration of the child at your place of residence, filing an application for tax deduction etc. All this will be told to you by specialists of guardianship and guardianship authorities. And they will also have to issue you an order - permission to spend the funds transferred monthly for the maintenance of the child.

If a child school age- you will also need to enroll him in school (it is better to take care of this in advance), inclusion in preferential lists for summer rest. If you plan to travel abroad, take care of obtaining a passport for a minor. If the child has savings, transfer them to a profitable replenishable deposit in a reliable bank.

There will be a lot of trouble, but most of them are pleasant. After all, these are the first manifestations of caring for the child and protecting his interests by you, already as his legal representative.

Setting up a foster family

If you nevertheless decide to register a foster family, then for this you need to return to the specialists of the guardianship and guardianship authority and draw up an appropriate contract. The contract is concluded within 10 days from the date of appointment of you as a guardian and must provide for:

1. information about the child or children being brought up in a foster family (name, age, state of health, physical and mental development);

2. the duration of the contract (i.e. the period for which the child is placed in a foster family);

3. conditions of maintenance, upbringing and education of the child or children;

4. rights and obligations of adoptive parents;

5. rights and obligations in relation to the foster parents of the body of guardianship and guardianship;

6. grounds and consequences for the termination of such an agreement.

As soon as the contract is signed, gratuitous guardianship turns into paid. And now, not the certificate of the guardian, but the order to create a foster family will become the main document saying that you are the legal representative of the child.

At the office of the guardianship and guardianship authority, you will have to write another application - for the payment of a monthly remuneration. As a rule, it is equal to the size of the minimum wage in the region. If specified in the contract, you may also be paid remuneration from the income from the child's property, but not more than 5% of the income for the reporting period during which the foster parent managed this property.

The contract can be concluded both in relation to one child, and in relation to several children. Please note that in the event of a change in registration at the place of residence of the child, the contract is terminated and a new one is concluded.

In preparing the material, the data of the manual “Social and legal foundations for the placement of children left without parental care in family forms of education” were used (Family G.V., Golovan A.I., Zueva N.L., Zaitseva N.G.), prepared with the assistance of the Ministry of Education and Science of the Russian Federation and the Development Center social projects, and taking into accountfederal law as ofas of October 1, 2013.

Until now, in our country, despite the efforts of individuals and the state, the number of orphans has not decreased. Every day, refuseniks from maternity hospitals arrive at orphanages, and children arrive at orphanages whose presence in their own families is life-threatening. government agency- a temporary measure, but not a way out of the plight of a little man, from whom the closest people have turned away. A child cannot grow up happy outside the family, which means that more than anything, he needs new, loving parents. In such situations, the only effective measure is a foster family. We are talking about a collective image of all families that carry out, take custody, arrange guardianship or resort to any other form of placing a child in a family.

What is a foster family

The following forms of foster families can be distinguished:

• Adoption - a child is adopted into a family as a blood relative. He becomes a full member of the family with all the rights and responsibilities.
• Guardianship - a child is accepted into a family for the purpose of upbringing and education, as well as to protect his interests. He may retain his last name, his natural parents are not exempted from the obligation to maintain it. Guardianship is established for children under 14 years old, and guardianship is issued from 14 to 18 years old.
• Patronage - a child is brought up in a family on the basis of a tripartite agreement between guardianship authorities, a foster family and an institution for orphans.
• Foster family - a child is brought up at home by a guardian on the basis of an agreement that determines the period for transferring the child to a foster family.

The experience of adopting orphans exists, and it is successful. However, the ability to accept a child is not given to every person - you need to carefully listen to yourself, try to find answers to internal questions. If you can’t make a decision on your own, you can always talk to a psychologist. It will help you “look inside” yourself and understand what exactly you need from life. Perhaps this is by no means helping the child, but a desire to satisfy some personal ambitions. In this case, you should not count on foster children - they are not at all obliged to justify your expectations.

A foster family, like any other, can face a number of problems with the advent of a child. The ability to solve them without loss largely depends on the willingness to accept a small person and on the competence of foster parents. The more clearly people understand what they are going through when they decide to raise a foster child, the better. Of course, in most cases, it will be more difficult for foster parents to cope with their functions than for relatives. The reason is simple - children who have experienced a tragedy (whether it be the death of loved ones, the destruction of a family, or the deprivation of mom and dad of parental rights) experience a deep emotional drama. Staying in an orphanage, where there is not a single relative, causes no less damage to the child's psyche. There is no one to count on and no one to share experiences with. In children's institutions there are only people doing their job. Even if they do it flawlessly, there will be no replacement for parental love.

Adaptation of a child in a foster family

Adaptation in the family lasts up to a year on average and is quite difficult. Diseases can worsen, unexpected tears and tantrums arise, denial of everyone and everything (“I don’t want”, “I won’t”, “leave”) and even aggression appear. All this is natural and will surely pass with time, provided that the parents are literate and their sincere love.

The adaptation of a child in a foster family can be divided into several stages:

• The preparation stage, when the child only visits new parents, comes to visit before the final acceptance of the baby into the family.
  During this period, foster parents try to make the child comfortable in the house, give gifts, praise and cheer him in every possible way. The child is trying to please the new parents. It is very important not to rush things and not put pressure on the child to call his parents "mom" and "dad".
• The stage of crisis, when the child begins to behave quite differently from what adoptive parents are used to seeing.
  The process is natural and should be considered as proper development relationships. If a child shows his bad sides to new parents, this is a sign of a trusting relationship.
• The stage of adaptation, when the child begins to feel at home in a new family.
  His appearance, behavior changes, the baby becomes independent and more self-confident. It should be remembered that any change in the family can cause psychological trauma to the child.
• The stage of stabilization, when the family finally becomes a family.
  Adopted child calm, although he may be disturbed by memories of past life and adoptive parents are satisfied with the state of their family.

The best way to “lay straw” in advance is to get the contacts of the necessary specialists in advance, before the child arrives in the family: doctors, neurologists, psychologists. And, without hesitation, at the first difficulties, turn to them.

How to become foster parents

Which children are placed in a foster family:

• children left without parental care, who are in institutions of social protection of the population, treatment-and-prophylactic, educational or other similar institutions;
• children whose parents, for health reasons, cannot take care of their maintenance and upbringing;
• children whose parents are deprived or limited in parental rights, are recognized by the court as incompetent or convicted;
• children whose parents are unknown;
• orphans

Algorithm for creating a foster family

• A candidate for foster parents submits to the Department of Guardianship and Guardianship a package of documents according to the list with an application for issuing a conclusion on the possibility of being a foster parent.
• Specialists of the Office within 3 days from the date of submission of the above documents conduct an examination of the living conditions of the candidate for foster parents and the examination report is approved by the head of the guardianship authority within 3 days. The examination certificate is drawn up in two copies, one of which is sent within 3 days to a citizen who has expressed a desire to accept a child into a family. The act of inspection can be challenged by a citizen in court.
• Within 10 days from the date of submission of documents, a decision is made on the appointment of a foster parent or on the candidate's ability to be a foster parent, on the basis of which a referral is issued to an organization for orphans and children left without parental care to get acquainted with the child, his personal file and medical conclusion about his state of health.
• In the case of a positive decision, the candidate writes a statement of intent to accept the child into the family.
• The organization for orphans and children left without parental care, as a legal representative, sends the child for a commission examination of his state of health (as for adoption) and, together with a medical opinion, with his consent to transfer the child to a foster family, submits to the Office a package of documents for child.
• Management prepares normative act on the possibility of transferring the child to foster care: on the appointment of a guardian (adoptive parent) acting on a reimbursable basis, on the need to pay Money for the remuneration due to the adoptive parent and for the maintenance of the child.
• The Office concludes an agreement with the adoptive parent on the transfer of the child to a foster family and, in addition to the agreement, prepares individual conditions for the transfer of the child, a certificate of the adoptive parent and hands the memo to the adoptive parent with the child's documents.
• If the candidate is from another MO, then the personal file is transferred to municipality at the place of actual residence of the foster family for the appointment of payment of funds and control over the conditions of upbringing and maintenance of the child.
• Foster parents are assigned monthly cash payments for the maintenance of children transferred to foster families, the amount of which in 2013 was 6543 rubles. 80 kopecks, and a monetary reward due to the foster parent in the amount of 2500 rubles (if the family is raising a child under 3 years old and a disabled child, then an additional payment is assigned to cash reward in the amount of 20%).
• Schoolchildren are paid compensation for travel 310 rubles 88 kopecks. When a foster parent transfers a child to a family, a lump-sum allowance of about 12,000 rubles is paid.

How to adopt a child?

Requirements for adoptive parents

Adoptive parents (parents) may be adults of both sexes, with the exception of:

• persons recognized by the court as incapable or partially capable;
• persons deprived by court of parental rights or limited by court in parental rights;
• dismissed from the duties of a guardian (custodian) for improper performance of the duties assigned to him by law;
• former adoptive parents, if the adoption is canceled due to their fault;
• persons with diseases in the presence of which it is impossible to take a child (children) to a foster family.

Foster parents are the legal representatives of the adopted child, protect his rights and interests, including in court, without special powers.

Persons wishing to take a child (children) for upbringing in a foster family submit an application to the guardianship and guardianship authority at their place of residence with a request to give an opinion on the possibility of being foster parents.

The following documents are attached to the application:

• Certificate from the place of work indicating the position and the average salary for 12 months, or another document confirming the income of citizens;
• An extract from the house book from the place of residence or another document confirming the right to use the residential premises or the ownership of the residential premises, a copy of the financial personal account from the place of residence;
• Certificate of the internal affairs bodies confirming the absence of a criminal record or the fact of criminal prosecution for crimes against life and health, freedom, honor and dignity of the individual (with the exception of illegal placement in a psychiatric hospital, slander and insult), sexual integrity and sexual freedom of the individual, against the family and minors, public health and public morality, as well as against public safety;
• Medical report on the state of health;
• A copy of the marriage certificate (if the citizen is married);
• Autobiography;
• A document confirming the availability of housing for a person (persons) who wants to take a child (children) to be raised in a foster family (a copy of the financial and personal account from the place of residence and an extract from the house book (by apartment) book for tenants of residential premises in the state and municipal housing stock or a document confirming the ownership of the dwelling);
• Written consent of adult family members, taking into account the opinion of children who have reached the age of 10 living together, to accept a child in a family;
• A copy of a certificate or other document confirming the completion of training (except for close relatives of children, as well as persons who are or were guardians (custodians) of children and who have not been removed from the performance of their duties, and persons who have been or are adoptive parents and in relation to whose adoption has not been revoked).

The first thing that every person who thinks about adoption needs to do is discuss his desire with the closest people: spouse and children. By the way, the widespread stereotype that only families that are deprived of the opportunity to give birth to their own should raise adopted children is not only far from the truth, but also harmful. On the contrary, families that already have children have experience in raising children and understand how difficult and time-consuming it is to raise children. But back to family members. Only if a consensus is reached, and there are no those who are “categorically against” in the house, can we move on to action.

The second step is schooling for foster parents. Finding the nearest of them is very simple: just contact the guardianship authority at the place of residence. They will be sent there. On average, classes last two months and this is not only a necessary, but also a pleasant stage on the way to placing a child in your family. A few weeks before graduation, you can safely start collecting documents. With intensive immersion in this issue (if both spouses take vacations for this purpose), the procedures will take one to two weeks.

The medical paperwork is in place, the foster parent's high school graduation certificate is in, and now it's time to get back into foster care. The specialist will inspect the premises of potential adoptive parents, help fill out questionnaires, write an application and prepare other Required documents. After that, you will have to wait two to three weeks for a decision. An important point is that future adoptive parents should already at this stage choose the form of placing a child in their family - adoption, guardianship, foster family, and so on. The complexity of this procedure is that it is impossible to guess in advance what status the child you will meet and love will have. If, for example, only “adoption”, it is no longer possible to take him under guardianship. Therefore, consult with a specialist how best to proceed.

Finding a child is the most difficult and lengthy stage. There will be many difficulties, disappointments and worries along the way. Despite the fact that in Russia there are about 600,000 children who live without a family, often children's institutions are in no hurry to part with them. And very often, especially when looking for a child under 3 years old, you will hear from guardianship specialists “we don’t have children.” Why this happens is the topic of a separate article. Most importantly, do not stop and do not despair. Do you have children. Do not limit the search only to your place of residence - potential adoptive parents in Russia have the right to search for a child throughout the Russian Federation. With perseverance and faith that you are doing the most important thing in life, your baby will definitely be found. And you will be together.

Foster parent experience

One of highlights successfully overcoming the difficulties in raising adopted children is communication with other parents who are in a similar life situation. The exchange of experience and the feeling "I'm not alone with my problems" always gives strength and helps to look at things realistically. Ideally, you need to find an organization that helps the placement of children and at the same time provides subsequent support for the family. We are talking about all kinds of non-profit foundations, structures and communities of foster parents. Communication with like-minded people is very important - both at the stage of making a decision, searching for a child, and at the very beginning life together. However, in the future, you should not interrupt the relationship. For adopted children, too. unique opportunity feel at ease and understand that the most beloved and close ones are not necessarily those who gave birth to you. But always those who love, who are there every day, from morning to night.

1. Try not to be guided by the opinion of people who are not adoptive parents themselves: they have no real idea about orphans.
2. Do not hesitate to conduct the necessary medical and psychological examination of the child before making a decision. In any case, it is necessary: ​​you need to clearly understand what and how to treat.
3. It does not hurt to remember all the time that genes form temperament, character, are responsible for health, but not for the fate of a person. Criminals and drug addicts are the result of upbringing and the surrounding society.
4. Seek help from psychologists and lawyers. Specialists consult free of charge in the Centers social assistance family and children.
5. Do not hurry. In case of doubt, uncertainty or problems in the family, wait. Resolve your issues and continue to communicate with other adoptive parents.
6. If you can't "recognize" your child, use your sense of smell. Smells clearly work on an unconscious level, prompting "my man" or not.
7. Do not try to draw in your imagination the image of the child in advance: everything will not be at all as you expected. And not even in the way that other adoptive parents have told you - each case is individual.
8. A child left without parents has a lot of hard and bad things in the past. He will get rid of this burden gradually, with the help of a new family. Don't rush things - it takes time.
9. Don't expect instant love from a foster child. What matters is what you have already changed to better life little person.
10. Let the child be himself. Observe his interests, talents and help consolidate them. Let the baby grow up happy.

Diana Mashkova